Positive Thoughts Help, but Allowing the Negative Ones...Heals
By Sandra Musser Weaver
Think positive thoughts...has been the mantra in the last number of decades by mental health experts and motivational gurus. But, it's the suppression of negative thoughts that is making us sick and unhappy. This may be new to you. There are key reasons why you should consider it.
But first, here's my story so you can relate to how negative thoughts affect positive thinking.
I used to be a positive thought and motivational seminar queen with a capital "Q". Yes, I would fly and drive all over North America attending seminars. My hand picked positive thought seminars have amazing curriculum that is second to none, and I recommend them highly. You'll discover parts of yourself hidden by fears and self-consciousness you never knew existed. But there are some important steps you'll want to take to get the most out of these seminars.
I learned a lot about myself from years of motivational and positive thought seminars. These seminars helped me find the courage and confidence to act on blind faith, and to follow my hearts guidance and visions. I'm glad I did.
Positive thought seminars pumped me up. I would be beaming with self-love, confidence, energy and drive throughout these motivational and positive thought seminars. I was on top of the world. The greatest of plans would be made, and some would stick. But the majority of these positive thoughts would fizzle weeks later. Can any of you relate to this?
By the second or third week home I was working hard to keep myself pumped up with as many positive thoughts as I could muster. The little plastic motivational and positive thought cards in my wallet from the seminars would remind me of what I had to do to bring myself back up, and they would work for a while. There job was to squash the negative and replace those thoughts with positive thoughts. This process wasn't sustainable, because they didn't reflect what I felt inside.
Subliminally, the negative thoughts would come slithering back like a venomous snake and bite me again no matter how I tried to replace them with positive thoughts. Denial of these unwanted feelings would rest just under the phony pasted smile on my face. Who was I kidding?
These denied thoughts screamed, "You're not good enough...smart enough...positioned well enough...educated enough....you don't have the right contacts!!! What are you thinking???" I'd slam positive thoughts right on the heels of this uninspiring thoughts.
It really hit home when I heard the founder of one of these seminars say he has to come back to his own seminars for a dose of positive thoughts and motivation energy or he would go to places he didn't care to. So, after dozens of such seminars, I started to question this anomaly...or was it?
It turns out that a very high percentage of people go right back to where they were before they attended these positive thought seminars. But, with an extra dose of guilt of course, because they failed. They just weren't able to hold onto what they learned during all the positive thought and motivational rah rah! Why?
We're taught to love ourselves by whispering positive thoughts to ourselves...but we don't believe it. Most of us really don't love ourselves, and no amount of positive thoughts is going to change that imprint. Yes, it's an imprint.
Negative thoughts are from the domain of the subconscious mind. The majority of positive thoughts come from our conscious mind.
In other words, we think the positive thoughts into existence, where as the negative ones percolate up from the subconscious mind. The negative thoughts are actually old imprints, habits or conditioning formed starting from birth. I'd like to take it a step farther and say...since the beginning of time. Hmmmmm.
I know the beginning of time seems very ancient and it is. But, I believe we repeat the same issues lifetime after lifetime till we heal them.
Negative thoughts are affecting us on the subconscious level. But why and how? Why do we do the things we do or feel the way we do? Why do we make bad or odd decisions?
These negative imprints shape our decisions, because they were so damaging or made such a deep impression, we shudder to repeat them. So, we see the possibility of the pattern repeating, and run in the opposite direction to avoid those traumatic feelings again. Often we have no conscious memory of the event that triggered these feelings of dread.
These feelings were never truly felt the first time, because of their trauma as in the case of rape, incest or other abuses. These repeating hidden emotions are coming back to get us to feel them completely so we can heal them.
Right now reruns are running our lives and making our decisions.
As a child you accepted what your parents said as gospel. Few of us heard positive thoughts. You picked up on "their" fears, "their" limitations of themselves. Demeaning comments were directed at you, but they were really how your parents felt about themselves based on "their" own imprints and conditioning from their parents?
Many of us in our childhood were subjected to:
- Lack of encouragement
- Being told we weren't worthy, not good enough, incapable or wrong
- Guilt and shame
- Sexual, physical or mental abuse in all it's forms
- A lack of feeling loved or encouraged.
No one can give what they don't feel towards themselves...move toward forgiving your parents and family.
The traumatic nature of these events, caused us to filter our future thoughts and visions through these imprints without even realizing it. In most cases there's no conscious memory of the original event. It was taken as truth, or it's memory is different than what actually happened, because we couldn't face the full extent of the memory.
These subconscious imprints must be brought into the conscious to heal.
These memories are not going to be pretty once they come into consciousness either. They wouldn't be in the subconscious if they were welcomed and dear to your heart. You cannot wish them away...justify them...or pretend to forgive them. But, if you would only feel them fully, they can heal.
No matter how many positive thoughts are put out, if these counter negative thoughts are ingrained as an imprint, your positive thoughts have not lasting power.
Even if negative imprints or conditioning are overridden for a time, they will surface again to haunt you. These imprints or habitual reactions are in control until you look at them, accept them, forgive, and find some love in them to heal them. Positive thoughts can't override them.
Accept negative emotions as yours without trying to cover them with positive thoughts.
You may ask, how do you reach these subconscious thoughts? You don't have to find them. They find you...all the time! They are triggered for the most part by what someone says or does. Sometimes it's an event or a place that reminds you, and the memory starts to push it's way to your consciousness.
Sadness, depression, anger, rage, etc. are caused by a subconscious memory surfacing. We become overwhelmed by them or just do what we've done all our lives...push unpleasant feelings back under the rug so we don't have to look at them. We force that smile and say it doesn't matter...but it does.
We tell ourselves positive thoughts in an effort to minimize or eliminate the negative ones again, and it works till the next time these feelings are triggered...and, they will be. Are you getting tired of this merry-go-round of abuse to your emotions yet? Are you ready to heal them?
Why don't these negative thoughts just go away? Some people go into deep depression, because they immerse themselves into beating themselves up or they blame someone else. Often they decide these words or events are true and feel totally unworthy. This is not how you heal them!!
Guilt is the negative imprint controlling you. Denial is used to suppress how you truly feel. Judgments tries to place blame somewhere else.
Take responsibility for your own healing! If you stay in guilt, denial and judgment it will take it's tole, and nothing will be accomplished but more sadness, and an affirmation that what happened is true. Victim consciousness will prevail. Are you starting to see why positive thoughts don't have a chance?
But, first you have to go there to know the futility of staying in these emotions. The key is to work your way beyond them to responsibility and healing.
Look at negative imprints for what they are! They're old imprints, old ideas that don't work in your life anymore. Get angry at them. You aren't that person anymore, and probably never were. You just believed in something that wasn't true. You can change your mind, and will be much happier if you do.
These ancient imprints can be healed. Negative thoughts are the insecurities and controlling nature of our masculine side, and the suppression of our own feminine doing her job of reflecting emotions back at us.
The feminine within tries to point out how the masculine is out of balance, only to be squashed by the controlling nature of our own masculine. The masculine is screaming for love, but does not want to accept what it's own feminine side is projecting back at it through emotions. The feminine is screaming for love and acceptance too. It's the lack of acceptance that keeps these rejected imprints coming back. They're yearning for recognition and love.
In most cases, these present day negative reflections are someone else's "opinion" based on their experiences and imprints.
Honoring and seeing the validity of our own emotions and intuition is the missing part of us...the feminine in all of us. Some call it the "Wild Man or Woman", our "Ultra Ego", "Shadow Self", or even "Lucifer". It's all the rejected feminine...locked in our subconscious mind.
Balance is possible when there are no secrets hidden in the subconscious mind and everything is clear in the conscious.
When negative thoughts are suppressed, they just go into hiding only to peak out again for recognition. Yes, recognition, acceptance,
and ultimately some love. The person we have to love and forgive in the end is ourselves.
It's accepting and forgiving another who hurt you. It's understanding they were acting out of their own unhealed imprints from when they were too young to know better too. It's only when you take responsibility for all that's in your life that you can heal, instead of blaming others.
The anger you feel towards another, the blaming, and the victim consciousness does not help. It keeps you in your pain.
To heal you must totally immerse yourself in your pain. Feel it to the depths of your soul...mourn it...get angry....scream as loud as you can...cry...feel sorry for yourself...say what you never said that you wanted to say...kick and punch...unedited and without regard for how anyone else feels.
Yes! Don't analyze what you're feeling...just feel it fully. Honor your own feelings. It's the movement and vibration of these old imprints out of your body that will heal you. Right now they are stuck, weighing down on you, because they are held in your body. One reflection is the extra pounds on overweight peoples bodies.
Watch out for guilt to try to keep you in your pain and as you are now. Don't accept guilt! Move beyond it to healing.
Something magical happens when your pain is expressed freely and unedited. Love seeps in from God to fill the space left by the releasing of these old pent up emotions. You start to see the light of this love as you are releasing. Understanding blossoms, and you're able to forgive yourself and whoever else was involved.
But, be prepared for an explosion of pent up emotions. Releasing minor emotions by yourself is recommended in a safe uninhibited place. You don't have to say them to the person you'd like to...you just have to say them and acknowledge them.
But, I don't recommend you go deeply into major imprints by yourself. These emotions have been suppressed a long time and have accumulated charge that could be physically dangerous to yourself or another. You may not be fully conscious when these emotions literally explode.
Hidden in our subconscious mind in denial, unforgiveness, and suppression is the key to our healing.
Balance and harmonious love will come to our conscious minds after their release. Positive thoughts will have power after negative imprints are released. The charge will no longer be waiting to sabotage our positive thoughts.
You will feel lighter in spirit(masculine), will(feminine), heart(the joining of the two) and body(the physical express of the two), because you will be lighter in every way. You will be more balanced between the four parts of you. This lightness will reflect through your whole being and shine out for everyone to see.
To heal we must have the courage to look at what is causing you to not love yourself.
Healed negative and ensuing positive thoughts will cause the kundalini energy to rise.
The stuck energy in the
affected seven chakra(s)
will clear allowing freer movement of
which brings more happiness through balance between your own masculine and feminine energies.
"Right Use of Will, Healing the Evolving Emotional Body," received by Ceanne DeRohan
"Original Cause 1, The Unseen Role of Denial," received by Ceanne DeRohan
"Heart Song, Vibrating Heartlessness to Let Heart in," received by Ceanne DeRohan
"Zero Limits," by Dr. Lew Len and Dr. Joseph Vitale
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